Monday, July 10, 2006

Candy is Dandy, But Liquor is Quicker

While I certainly don't even come marginally close to drinking as much as I used to drink during my middle years in college, every once in awhile, I get my binge on, knocking back an incredible amount of liquor in a short period of time. Like most people who've gone to college, I certainly have my fair share of stories involving alcohol that I'm sure will be told and retold time and time again for the rest of my life. (Sarah, ahem.)

Since I've been back home, I've avoided the whole drinking scene, partly because I'm broke, and partly because it's just not the same anymore without my college buddies.

However, last Thursday and Friday were two days where I relived my drinking heyday, chilled with old friends, and drank my ass off. Beginning with an afterwork spot in midtown Manhattan, I knocked back a countless amount of cranberry vodkas and tequila sunrises, and then, somehow, made my way to some college bar about 20 blocks north for an even greater number of 50-cent beers. I knocked back so many, that I was beginning to scare some of my old high school friends, who showed up to hang out for old times sake.

"Damn, Ray, another one?! All I remember doing in response was screaming aloud, "Man, this is how we do it up at Syracuse," as I raised my mug of beer to the sky and cheered along with God knows how many SU folk who suddenly invaded this traditional NYU/Columbia University watering hole. Everywhere I turned, someone else had 2 mugs of beer ready for me to drink, and within minutes, I downed them, just to get another two in my hands moments later.

Despite the amount of drinks that I had, within an hour, I was completely sober. And I mean sober. By 4 in the morning, I was sobering up at home, happy with the knowledge that I could still hold my liquor.

While I normally don't binge one day after another, I made an exception the next evening, when, in honor of my mother's birthday, I took one for the team and went out to some overhyped, incredibly expensive club that let us in for free on her behalf and gave us "free" drinks with mandatory tips. Sure, it was an incredibly shady situation, but hell, there's nothing better to keep from getting upset about shady happening than to consume liquor! So, off we went, my momma, her boyfriend, myself, and a few of her friends from work, drinking, drinking, drinking. Of course, because the liquor from the night before had yet to leave my system, the second I tasted liquor on Friday, I got tipsy. But, me being the, "hey, I still got it," dickhead I am, kept on drinking as if I hadn't binged the night before, and before long, I was super drunk. I was spilling drinks, telling people they couldn't dance, and generally trying incredibly hard to keep myself from falling flat on my face. Thankfully, we were ALL drunk, especially my mother, who was even sillier than I was, so with her around, I wasn't drawing attention to myself. Not that she was all over the place, but man, she can certainly talk up a storm. Like, "shaddap, I'm trying to enjoy my drunkedness here!" Somehow, we got home and I knocked out the hell out within moments.

The next morning, I definitely felt it. I was hung over. Hangovers are rare for me, but when they do happen, it's usually pretty bad. Thankfully, I wasn't too bad off, and after a couple of hours, I was able to get up and get some food in my system. By the time I finished eating, I was A-OK, again. I was afraid that I was going to be sick all weekend, but my liver certainly worked some overtime to keep that from happening. So, it all worked out in the end.

I hadn't even settled down from my meal when someone texted me asking me to go out again for more drinking. Man, no thanks. By Saturday afternoon, if I even saw a bottle of liquor, I would get drunk, let alone actually consuming more of it.

"You're getting old," my mother said.

Never mind, I wasn't the one with the birthday the next day.

And on that note, "Happy Birthday," to my mom, and to my abuelo, who I'm sure was up in the sky looking down on me running around making a fool of myself. I'm sure he'd be proud. :-)

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